Nudity in Stardom (a.k.a. Algebra 101)

I will start by giving Miley Cyrus the benefit of the doubt—I've never known the pressures of fame or the pull of extreme wealth and stardom. They may have powers over a person that are much harder to resist than I expect from her. BUT, to my credit,  I understand art. I understand expression. I understand symbolism. I don’t understand using the same old played-out trick of nudity in its various forms and extents to try to sell one more album, one more concert ticket. It’s so old. It’s not creative. It’s the same formula over and over again. You’re just changing the coefficients.

 i [(Person * x% nude + y)]^z]= newest trick; 

where i=some sort of action (e.g. kissing, etc. etc.), x=number 0-100, y=some object (e.g. sledgehammer, foam fan #1 finger), z=# of people also involved (e.g. back-up dancers, partners)

Let’s see, I’ll be naked on a motorcycle, I’ll be naked on a giant wrecking ball. I’ll be naked holding a blanket in front of me. I’ll be naked holding a basketball. What’s next? OF COURSE! I’ll be naked and making out with a sledgehammer! And I’ll top it off with a live performance of me nearly naked rubbing one of those foam fan fingers all over myself! Seriously? I can’t begin to describe the visceral effect this has on me.   And it’s not the kind of visceral response she’s hoping to elicit in her fans. There’s nothing remotely attractive or luring or desirable in her performances. It’s so UNclever.  And frankly I’m a little angry that she sold out and that she’s leading all those sweet little ‘tweens off a dangerous cliff. The girl has a lot to offer. She has a great voice. She’s beautiful. She has a beautiful body. But there’s a difference in celebrating the naked body through photography or other forms of art and dry-humping inanimate objects. I consider it a cheap, obvious ploy to get attention that has the negative side effect of drawing everyone who has to watch it down.  You’re too young, Miley. If you have to keep one-upping yourself each time you go out the door of your home, you’re really going to find yourself in a bad spot. Very soon.