Ignorance Training

Some professional baby-whisperers/physicians call the art and science of getting an infant to sleep through the night "sleep training". One of the methods of doing this is the use of a pacifier. Here it is in a nutshell: A baby of certain size and age who is well-fed just before bed is likely waking up in the middle of the night only out of habit or a general need for sucking- rather than for the need of calories. So, when you are ready to begin sleep training and your child cries in the middle of the night, simply give her a pacifier rather than feeding her. Eventually, the child will stop waking up, because a pacifier just isn't worth waking up for.

I guess we're sleep training Asher now, but I realized that I am going through my own sort of training. I call it Ignorance Training. I'm on the fast track to having absolutely no knowledge in my head. And how am I getting to that point? What is my pacifier? I'll tell you- it's Google. When, throughout the course of the day, a "cry in the night" comes in the form of a question, I simply offer myself a chance to google the answer rather than actually trying to think of the answer myself. For example, here are some things I have googled in the past few days:

What was the name of that American Idol finalist with the funny teeth? (Elliot)
Can I make potato soup in a crockpot? (Yes. Several recipes are available)
Is focused spelled with one s or two? (Either is acceptable)
What is a substitute for buttermilk? (Milk + lemon juice or vinegar)
Who sang that song "If you leave, don't leave now..."? (OMD)

Google has the answer to all of these questions. Soon, I will train myself to go to Google before even consulting for a split second with my own memory. And what do I do if Google is not available (heaven forbid!) when a question pops up? Push it aside, I say! It's not worth it! After all, who really needs to know the capital of Malaysia or how many ounces there are in a liter? Not me. Not until I can use my pacifier.

(Note: I believe sleep training and ignorance training are highly correlated, but I don't feel like thinking enough to hash that all out. Perhaps someone else has written about it... on the internet.)